"yooooooush" (japanese for alright!)

listening to: [ nothing ]

I bought 4 blank medium textured canvases today.

I'll definately have to write that uni letter by tonight or tomorrow and get that police report from the actual police station because after turning my room upside down i can't find it.

The sprinter crew showed up and tried to help me with my room earlier this afternoon but they advised i needed concrete screws for the wall mounted single board shelves (cheap ass ikea!)

But eh, nothing to complain.

I've got rice and bought myself a drift button for my sprinter, or should i say e-brake slide inducer and put a friend's company logo on my rear window.

It was a good day just to see how the sprinter guys again and had another cool cruise with CB radios. Chad called yesterday after i thought he disappeared from the planet and we catched up... seems his little beast has blown a clutch. (his roommate is so hot! but i'm definately not her type.. aww)

I've started writing pieces for my comic book again and hopefully get the foundation right and begin writing my first draft by this month or next... it's gonna be big!

Grace noted the other day i was really negative on a few aspects on my life and by God she's right. Ever since the aftermath post, i really took the time to realise i've never been so happy...

I no longer feel sad, bitter about anything.

Lam is one issue that was bothering me but in all good faith i now optimistically hope we can be aquaintences again and go from there... there is truly no sense in feeling so shit.

Helen, the ball is in her court and that's who she is. She likes to have control over almost every aspect in her life and well i'm only a telephone call away... and again hopefully that'll have a positive outcome. She does mean a lot to me, and i really miss her but there's only so much i can do and respect her decision.

I was also very hesitant on new relationships in particular having another girlfriend again because ever since Ying i've never been quite the same. I wasn't sure if i wanted to put that effort in again nor was i ready to step out and just really open my heart up. Lately, since my eyes are more open than before and i can really see how people's attitudes are i know there's a really nice girl out there :D

This month i've sorted my annoying and ongoing cheque problem with CBA (god i hate that bank) and managed to also reduce my creditcard limit to nearly 0.

I've re-vamped my room, painted, helped out family, caught up with friends and did nearly 100% of the things i wanted in this 1 week off work. I never realised when you have such a short space of time to complete something and get off my boney lanky ass to do it... much can be done.

Next week i plan to take Sab (my newly acquired apprentice whom i see as a younger brother) to see new things he probably never seen or felt before. I want to help him in seeing his true potential to achieve what he wants in the future and ace VCE.

I've never seen such wisdom in a 16 yo before. When i was at that age i thought i was king dick, and what my parents, fmaily, teachers and ... higher authorities said were irrelevant. Sab is clearly different from his peers... and dispite the shit conditions of trying to become a 'man' in a teenage angst filled world with all this bullshit trends, expectations from friends, reputation to live up to; he has an undenyable under-dog talent and the brains to get there when his family, teachers lose faith in him. I only feel like i'm passing on information that was handed to me by figures i hold close to my heart when i was growing up.

Therefore, a big thank you to firstly:

Rui: My cousin, and one of the most intelligent, quiet achievers i've ever seen. His mind is contantly switched on, and his ability to analyse, interpret and use information is staggering. I feel very blessed to have such a kind person who've always treated me as an equal even when i was only a toddler and he was in parimary school. Rui gave me the ability to also rationalise and set thing's straight.

Without him, i would've been lost.

Avon: My other cousin on the other side of the role model spectrum who i mentioned earlier. The only ever person to believe in what i do, and what i can do with ALL her heart and has supported me since i drew something when i was 10 or something. Thank you again, my talent would've only gotten me so far if you had'nt told me i can go further.

Xin Hao: A wise traveller and the master of business. Reminds me of Rui, in the intelligence department however he was a great philosopher in his own right. Though, i haven't heard from him in nearly a year and i doubt i will ever see or speak to him again he showed me the world as it is. He teached about the nature of people and the world and how we as people can operate in our fullest potential to overcome obsticles faced by many. Most importantly, he taught my the nature of our own lives and basically meant never to stop trying as we are all put here for a reason. His philosophy is everything happens for a reason, everyone knows what they're here to do and even if you do not, you're still doing something. Every person we bump into and share a few words may be positive or negative and that'll shape us for a greater picture we all cannot see.
Perhaps my meeting with him, and my time spent with him and saw him as a brother helped me see the world and finally myself.

Well.. i should go... i'm getting hungry and this is getting long. Thanks again to everyone in my life... good or bad.

-Jay