Listening to: [ The Get Up Kids - Long Kiss Goodnight ]

It's the kind of period in winter where the winds stay at bay and the land welcomes the thickest blanket of fog that looks like you can cut it with a butterknife.

The air solidifies your lungs with each breath and street lights flicker like candles.

Towering giants that once were sky scrapers becomes shades in the distance.
Not a creature stirs.
I light my cigarette and disturb the silence.

Sacriligeous.

My shivers for an instant, my taste and sense of sight feels numb.

Am i dreaming?

I'm sitting alone in the dark, my companion fizzles and there is nothingness.

I don't feel afraid as i usually am in a similar situation nor do i feel lonely.
Cold but not freezing i stand there admiring my nothingness.

Distortion goes through my mind, captivated by this silence that is as certain as the call of death but still nothing.

If death sings such sweet lullaby then surely this isn't so grim.
I blow icicles, twirl them with my tongue as the smoke dances, it floats away disappearing with the rest of the world.

I'm not bitter. Am i?
Wooly jumpers, chocolate in a mug made in a country far away become my most prized possessions.

The marshmellows bounce in the chocolate. As if it were something to celebrate.
But it is!

I have found space. My space. Surely this is heaven!

The choir of angels sing my song and my marshmellows respond.
I love a winter wonderland.

-Jay

Phew wat a ride!!!

Listening to: [ Josie and the Pussycats - Spin around ]

What a weekend!

The firm just got back from an awesome trip at Buchan caves (info is at the comicminutes website).

I'm just flatout these days trying to get this firm off the mark, no pun intended and i feel energised to do so.
I do wish sometimes i was healthier which means eating more and smoking less but the time (and money) doesn't seem to permit it right now.

I've been thinking lately to get a job to just help make ends meet with my credit card and other expenses but i'm worried this'll affect my school and my business.

Generally, all i good and i feel great. The trip gave me exactly what i needed. Busy busy busy for this year and bext year i reckon.

-Jay

One step closer...

Listening to: [ Star Wars OST - Across the Stars ]

I've writing for 4 hours straight. I had a shot of cuppucino earlier after watching Batman with Jover, Ted, Omer, McMahon and of course Monin (which i gave a 9.5 out of 10)

Currently, we're at the writers crunch period where all of the writers in the firm has decided to complete the initial draft before we head up to the caves for a personal touch to the story (as well as visually).

We registered the business earlier this evening with the partners and i have been writing since. The character's have come alone and i truly believe this feeling will allow us to produce really good work. Everyone is hush hush outside of the firm but we are expecting result within time and on budget.

Of course, none of this will be possible without the efforts of the dedicated individuals who persue this as passionately as i'm and for that i'm incredibily lucky and thankful for.

I sometimes wonder how extremly rare and fortunately for me to have found friends who want to also break the paradime and do something different in their lives. They are the most warm, unselfish and artistic group of people i've ever met and i'm given the oppurtunity to work along side with them. How lucky of me.

I must add however, this continual lack of sleep may have sideeffects on me in the long term and in the short term a burst of incoherence and mood swings. I hope they will forgive me in time as i have sort of notice a slight change in my behaviour like i'm saying something before i speak.

Nevertheless, we have a job to do. I feel like i have to complete it now and writing this blog is wasting my time. Caffeine, really evil stuff but everyone at this age and this lifestyle will say the same.

Until next time,

-Jay, sleepy pansy Jedi Knight

Star Wars personality test

I'm the greatest jedi knight of them all!!!

YAAAAAAAAAY!
Thanks to CJ for this test.
If anyone gets jar jar binks i will no longer be ur friend.

-Jay

numb

Listening to: [ GT - You are here ]

Man, it's been awhile since i blogged i know.
Lately i've been feeling really numb. I lost my license for 3 months (ending Sept) and i haven't been out or anything since most of my friends have sitll got exams and i'm flat broke.

I think i passed my exams; i can say i studied pretty hard this semester but knowing monash i'll get shitty marks. I'm worried about what might happen if i fail anymore.

Worries. So many worries. The firm is doing well and we've run over the capital budget yesterday even tohught we're technically still in "intermission".
I just feel really bummed out... i need to really recharge myself again and i think a trip to the city or a stroll down the gallery will be a eye opener.

Naturally i save all the best updates for last and that is i got a new apple G4 powerbook laptop. i LOVE IT!

Once the firm resumes business u can trust i'll be there brandishing ye olde faithful laptop ready to conquer the comic industry ;)

Now there's wishful thinking!!!

Anyway, back to vegging out.

-Jay

im ugly!!!

Listening to: [ Placebo - Special K ]

I haven't spelt in 2 days. My eyes are baggy as, i have yellow teeth and i have accumulated extra pimple friends.

*sigh*

I hate Uni. I still reckon it's bullshit i have an exam on the first day and i finish 3 days later with the other 2 subjects. This was epxected though but i'm finding it really tough at the moment.

God i'm hideous.

and and... yeh.

zzzZzzz

-Jay

STRESS?!?!?!?! WHO'S STRESSED?~!?~?!~?? ME~!?~?!?~

D'AAAAAAAAAAAARGH~! IM GONNA FAIL!

*BREATHES ERRATICALLY*

...

*cries like a baby*

These practise exams papers are uber harD~!~!~!~
WAAAAAH~!

-Jay

PANCAKES AND ICECREAM!

Listening to: [Portishead - Numb ]

My made her uber delicious short stack topped with syrup and ice cream!
3 more days t'ill the exams... go i'd better get back to it.

Everything's been very stressful and boring but the music, cigarettes, coffee and pancakes arem aking it better.

Until next time.

-Jay

p.s: I dont care what u think Cat, Ryan is homo! I hope he dies. i hope the entire crew dies!!!!!!!!!! ... hmm that was a bit evil wasn't it?

I hate the OC

Listening to: [ Van Morrison - Moondance ]

I hate the OC.

I saw an episode and i concluded i'd rather gouge my eyes out with an ice cream scooper than watch that filth ever again.

For all the OC lovers out there, stiff shit but i stand my ground.

In summary here's 3 reasons why i hate the OC:

1. It's fucken stupid
2. It has the ugliest fucknut as a lead role, Ryan.
3. Ryan.

Every episode is like a masterpiece of brilliantly crafted written in the formula of Melrose Place but for Dummies. For the sake of character dynamics they'll add a new character to get "bicycled" around before kill her off when all the original characters have already slept with each other.

Kudos for the hot lesbians that suckers in the ignorant males audiences to watch before of two half naked babes go at it. I'm sure they're keeping it "real" as most lesbians weigh more and outclass me with hair in my wildest nightmares. Tool.

The entire plot is about rich spoilt drop kicks in sunny california in a province called the Orange County. Thhe plot takes a twist when "bad boy" Ryan feels attraction for the hot lesbian. Cutting edge stuff story fellas.

I feel sorry for the chick, no really i do.
For her to even get remotely close to his saturating sly presences makes a walk in the amazon a piece of cake.
Let's cut to the chase shall we???

It's his face.

I hate his face. His hair resembles Donald Trump, his armpit hair makes the portuguese man 'o war look like a plaything and finally is his fucken smug sonova dumb twat face. FUCKEN DIE CUNT DIE!

My favourite episode is where i go to Ryan's house, "sneak like a ninja" and lay the runniest, egg filled turd my sphincter has even done in 21 years. Using Ryans array of stylish "bad boy" singlets, rub that Tusson RIGHT THERE and secretely sneak back out.

When 'ol chum ryan return and before he has a chance to question, "I don't remember my bed to be yellow" I'LL RAM HIS COCK UGLY FACE INTO MY STOOL!

Game over.
.Fade to blade with credits.

--------------------------------------

"And the winnder for this year's Academy Awards for "BEST OUTSTANDING PERFORMANCE".... goes to... oh i can't believe it! JAY! For his work on the OC in episode "006:Yellowfinger""

*Standing Ovation*

Ahh... i feel much better.

-Jay

Take that!!! "KAPOW!" BAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHHA