winter wonder morning...

Listening to: [ The Corrs - Radio ]

It's a drizzly morning and i got about 3 hours sleep and i'm buzzing. The clock just struck 38 past 7 and i think it's a great chance to catch up on my studies and some stuff about the firm because i have a 21st to go to in about 12 hours.

I got back from Nate's 22nd, and it was a refreshing feeling to see some faces i haven't seen in about 2 months. Glad to see that everyone is doing well, and it reminds me it's one of those faces, the smiles that never change when everything else does.

I haven't left the house (in a social meeting) for about 2 months and really i think it's time i just ... went out!

Finding transport there is tough, more than i imagined with only 2 more weeks to go with my license suspension and i'm back into gear so i had to call upon a favour from Hanz. As always Hanzel is always happy to come along despite his disinterest in asian night clubs but we both agreed it's tiem to meet up with "the boys" again.

One person i was glad to see tonight is John. Big John, everyone's big brother and as always he gave a warm reception. Needless to say Nathan was drunk when we arrived but later when he got his birthday cake in the face (thanks to John and Aaron) we had a small moment where we realised it's been a year since i sat in that chair and it was his 21st.

I told him time changes thing's but it's been years since we have moved on our own ways yet the people are still here who care about him and looking around this made sense to me too.

Lately i've been catching up with a lot of high school people. One example is Mina, and i haven't really had a good chance to know what he's been up to and we spent about 3 hours outisde the Uni cafe talking about old times and the new.

Winter is coming to another end and i anxiously await summer. This year has definately been a busy one and i can't wait to just drop a couple of weights from my shoulder and take a walk on the beach. I feel i need that inspiration to get me into 2007... the thing i was missing for this year. Come to think of it, i haven't touched the beach at all... :
I have compiled a list of what i'm going to do during summer:

-finished my half-arsed bedroom renovation and consider (with Mum's approval) to completely do the rest of the house.
-paint my massive canvas i got ages ago with oil instead of acrylic.
-get together a temp band and play for a live crowd in a pub.
-go to the comedy festival (i refuse to miss it again).
-take a long scenic drive, destination? Doesn't matter as long as there is road, supply of food i'll be right.

For now before i work myself into a frezy i gotta finish what i start. Which is Uni and Project Pilot.

-Jay

Wedding Crashers

Just got back from watching "Wedding Crashers"

Yep, a hilarious movie, the characters were written well and the directing was cool.
I dislike Will Ferrell but thank god it was only a cameo.

The story is about two best friend's who've inheirited a secret technique to party for free, drink free booze, lay women and socialize by as the title states, crashing weddings.

A wedding goes horribly wrong as one friend lands a creepy, kooky and "leeching" girl played by Isla Fisher and the other mate falls in love another. I don't really want to spoil it as this kind of situation often leads into a disasterous result with funny results.

4/5

-Jay

Plan, Organise, Lead and DESTROY!!!

Listening to: [ Record of Lodoss war - Kiseki no Umi ]

Drained. Tired.

That's what i'm. But tomorrow will be different. I spent an hour looking through EVERYTHING that needs to be done and though i'm a bit behind i'm certain i will come out fine. Why?

I'm sick of doing half-assed stuff. Especially uni. It's week 5 and i still think it's week 2. The fun stops here and i'm going to make sure everything is done because i just really wanna kill these next couple of month.

The title comes from the earliest management theory on manager behaviour "POLC" as some who done commerce might remember. POLC stands for "plan, organise, lead and control"

I'm apply this simple abbreviation into my life, instead of control my future which is the ultimate goal anyway, i want to completel annihilate it. The smoking has come down significantly and i'm getting hints from my body that if i press on and set a date it will be ready to give up on nicotine too.

I've gone days, even though i really want to smoke when the time passes and i find myself doing something else i'm fine. I keep saying i will quit but i'm slowly getting there and there's a point where i WILL just put a stop to it. All those who don't have this nasty habit i don't expect them to understand how hard it is.

My firm is coming along well, and week by week we are getting more refined in terms of how we operate and what need to be done and looking back some might say we did shit all but i see the real progress into putting the effort and time into thinking about it, planning it and making it happen. Start something as Omer would say.

That's enough for me. Tomorrow belongs to me.

-Jay

Shoe string...

Listening to: [ Live - Turn My Head ]

It's cold and it's 17 past 4 in the morning.

My head seemed a bit troubled. Physically i feel drained and can barely open my eyes but my brain won't stop buzzing.

Today was my day of redemption and i screwed it up. I had the cmic thing on the weekend and i promised i would use today to catch up on my studies and i didn't.

I did try to do some questions but the words to me didn't make any sense. I would read something and it just would'nt register... so i settled for lecture note reading, my excuse for being productive.

Starting today i'll slowly try to nurture my health back to normal with eating patterns that is normal.
I'm gonna put a stop to telling myself i'm some sort of a superhero that can whizz by on 5-6 hours of sleep...

I just want this Uni degree over and done with. Just so sick and tired of it... exhausted.

It's just that lately, thing's just don't seem right.

Thing's haven't been the same since Aunty lisa came here and stole pictures i had up on my wall. Feels like everything i'm doing is crumbling. Jenny and Mum are asking me to help out with the rent and i of course have nothing..

I can't even pay my amenities fee... i feel kinda hopeless...
On top of that there's of course the credit card and the tax which i gotta pay back. The only thing keeping me smiling is my tax return which i calculated could ease visa for a bit.

I've noticed i'm a bit moody as well... which means there's more strings to tie up.

So many loose strings...
I might tie as many as i can this week but it's hard to get around without a car (do tax return, buy groceries, go to school) and i feel stuck having to ask all the time...

One thing that i'm looking forward to is Vito and I have organised a mini laser tag in 2 week at the grange. Today was the first tiem in years feeling young at heart again.

When your 22 and you start forgetting stuff like that i think that's when you do hit rock bottom...

-Jay

B-Day +1

Listening to: [ Audioslave - Shadow of the sun ]

Well im sitting here in the caufield library trying to catch up on my hw.

After the events of last night, Mum has bought me Mi Goreng from the shops because i think she understood she was being a bit unfair.

I'm glad i didn't crack a hissy fit.

Today i just chilled at home, playing my guitar and made pancakes for Grace who is unwell.

I'm currently waiting for mark to arrive so we can study together.

Busy is probably the best word i can use this semester which is great bcos i always have something to do.

can't talk. Gotta work.

-Jay

Happy Birthday to me.

Yep. It's that time of year again. No it's not the tax return but equally as depressing... it's my birthday.

Nothing planned for this year.. Yesterday Mark, Omer, Jover and Monin came over and we cooked tacos and bought 4 boxes of ice cream.

Chow and Cat swung by and watched Star Wars : Clone wars.

That just pretty much says i'm a nerd. Sad.

Today we had the first production meeting and covered some good ground, i came home to find there was last night's dinner. I asked my Mum to make Mi Goreng and she told me no and swore back at me...

Usually i would really get upset that she refuses to do any motherly duties but i said can that be my birthday present? And obviously i got a no.

This kind of thing i expected to see at the movies with a character that is unbeliveably nasty it's fictional. Well, this is my Mum and fiction is never out of the question. Just made me feel sad for her actually...

Too numb to care right now, but i went to get KFC with Monin and i just got home.
Birthdays are for wussies. *sigh*

-Jay